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Tentacles

Yep. Totally knew what would happen.

We just finished another dungeon. How do you feel? Bored at the lack of homo romance in the game. Well if you are, I won't say anything anymore, because we still have 3 more dungeons to loot, and this is when things start to speed up.

Frostbite Caves (It's not)

EBF3 Valley13

If you could spot the reference in this part's name, you're a genius. Anyway, our next destination is a frozen wasteland which is also the spot of a recently erupted small volcano (not that one at the end of the game). You might realize that this stuff is located literally right next to a sunny beach/lake thingy, but don't worry - stranger things have happened in real life.

As always, let's think about what we want. Obviously, it's cold here, so we want some warm stuffs to cover ourselves. There is the Knight Helmet hidden in this area - it'll give you some nice Defense at the cost of some weaknesses, but it's not what we want here. Most of the wildlife here is also weak to Fire and Earth, so be thankful that I told you to train Eruption, Cataclysm and Airstrike earlier. You should also train Lance's Bullet Hell for this area, if you haven't figured out.

Back to the area. The chest containing the Knight Helmet is hidden in a corner behind some trees, so it should be hard to spot. The only mob spawn here is the giant blue slime guarding the chest next to the tent - remember the time when that green slime used to be dangerous? There is also a secret path to the left side, which is impossible to see so you'll have to hug the wall to find it. Go there, smash the chest open, then loot the tent and go down to continue.

  • Chests:
    • Tent: 1 Hamburger, 5 Muffin, 2 Softdrink
    • Southeast area, hidden behind branch: Knight Helmet, 3 Steel Plate, 3 Bubble Stone
    • Guarded by slime: 1 Ice Crystal, 3 Bubble Stone, 3 Rainbow Gems
    • Secret area: 1 Ruby, 5 Red Potion, 5 Dragon Fin
  • Quests:
    • Alana:
      • Objective: 1 Pizza
      • Rewards: 1 Cake, 1 Chocolate, 1 Coffee
    • Blondie:
      • Objective: Stolen Wallet
      • Rewards: 1 Bacon, 1 Choco Cornet, 1 Yoghurt
EBF3 Valley23

This area contains a few Glacier Eaters, and they'll show you a bit more about the foes in this area. Almost all of their attacks are harmless, but they have the ability to cast a bunch of snowflakes to freeze the entire team (be glad you don't fight them in the previous game, where the last hit of that attack is guarantee to freeze you). The freezing will render your team hopeless until they attack you, but good thing it can be thawed with a healing spell, so keep Regen always active from now on. Other than that, loot everything then go down to continue. By the way, there is a secret path in the southeast corner well hidden under the leaves, and you can see it better when you go down.

  • Chests:
    • Guarded by bushes: 3 Milk, 1 Silk, 1 Coffee
    • Guarded by turtles: 1 Battery, 1 Ice Crystal, 3 Icecream
    • Next to the fallen tree: 3 Fine Fur, 2 Silk, 1 Ice Crystal
    • Secret path: 5000 Gold, 10 Steel Plate, 1 Curly Horn
  • Quests:
    • Vicky:
      • Objective: 5 Silk, 10 Fine Fur
      • Rewards: 2 Pizza, 1 Bacon, 1 Beef
EBF3 Valley33

A bunch of knights and a castle? Must be one of those crappy web tower defense game. They're not my favorite type of game, since you just stare at the screen for hours. Anyway, this area contains a few gears for Natalie, and none of them are interesting: The Ice Shards give her resistance to ice, while the Death Bringer greatly boosts her attack at the cost of survivability. Since we're using her as a potion, you'll want to always keep the Crystal Staff and the Nurse Hat while ditching everything else, and even if you main Natalie, the Crystal Staff will give you better Magic boost.

This area itself is quite interesting, since you can relax for a bit and talk to the NPCs. The vikings here have given up on fighting the wildlife, since they can't use magic at all (Matt begs to differ on this one). This area also contains a hidden path next to one of the vikings - you know what you're going to do, right? When everything is done, go left.

  • Chests:
    • Between logs: Ice Shards, 5 Ice Crystal, 5 Rainbow Gems
    • Guarded by cats: Death Bringer, 2 Purple Potion, 10 Garlic
    • Secret path: 5 Fine Fur, 2 Silk, 2 Pineapple
EBF3 Valley32

See that giant slab over there? Don't fight it yet. It's one of the spookiest foes in the entire area. It's so spooky, we'll have to do a bit of preparation for it. First, Matt should switch out for the Gaia Axe, then buy a Gold Plate to get the Steel Shark from a quest in Rock Lake (it's the best magical gun in the game, so we should totally use it now). Second, make sure that either Natalie or Lance has Syphon. Now you can start the fight.

Viking Monolith

EBF3 Battle Viking Monolith

Actually less damaging than it looks.

Here you will witness the myth, the legend, the bane of all EBF3 players: The monoliths. Well, I believe the elementals with their 11-jab combo are more dangerous, but most of the community would say otherwise.

The Viking Monolith will appear on the second wave. Its signature attack is a powerful ice beam every 3 turns that will severely damage the entire and also freeze them, leaving us open to more ice beams. And because we're playing on Epic, this is pretty much the first thing it will do - talk about making an impression. Between its super powerful ice lazors, it will buff its allies, drop an ice spike that could insta-kill a player, or just mock your effort.

Despite everybody else screaming at the sight of The Rock, I think that this is easier than the first minigame. The monolith can freeze you, so keep Regen always on, if you haven't figured that out. Have Natalie cast Barrier to buff the team's Magic Defence to maximum, while Matt and Lance pound it with Cataclysm and Airstrike. Syphon will render the thing completely useless, but the monolith is resistant to it so you'll have a hard time making it work. See, it wasn't that hard... at least at this level.

With that out of the way, we can finally access what this screen has to offer. There are 2 quests in this area, and they all give some nice armors - the Genji Armor gives Matt an excellent boost in Attack as well as in defenses, and the Pope Dress will give Natalie important resistance to Dark in the final area. The chick will also give you the Guardian skill, which isn't too useful since it can only buff one person. The one chest we can grab on the other hand contains an Earthball, but you can't skip it because medals. Grab everything, fight through the elemental guarding the bridge (it has another monolith waiting), then go right to continue.

  • Chests:
    • Guarded by eyeballs: 1 Earthball
  • Quests:
    • Hajime:
      • Objective: 3 Gold Plate
      • Rewards: Genji Armor, 2 Chocolate
    • Celeste:
      • Objective: 1 Pearl, 3 Light Rune, 5 Sad Statue
      • Rewards: Guardian, Pope Dress, 10 Talisman
EBF3 Valley31

OMG Vikings! I remember those guys in FF3, they're awesome tanks that allowed me to curb-stomp the game at low levels. Unfortunately, we're not playing that game, and they're NPCs so we can't use them... There are still a lot of stuffs to do here though:

  • The dude with the red hair is guarding the entrance to another secret area, which can be unlocked with 30 medals. This is the first area to actually give Lance guns that boost his Magic Attack, if you don't want to buy a Gold Plate for the Steel Shark.
  • There are 2 paths to the north, seperated by the igloo or something. The left will lead to a nice cave, where you can find a ton of loot. The right path will allow you to continue the story.
  • All of the igloos contain the Viking's belongings, so you should steal them. There is also a path to the previous screen which will give you some cash.

I will tell you about the loot cave later, since this section is getting long.

  • Chests:
    • Under vikings, first chest: 1 Bacon, 1 Cake, 1 Choco Cornet
    • Under vikings, second chest: 2000 Gold, 3 Curly Horn
    • Left igloo: 1 Hamburger, 2 Softdrink, 1 Coffee
    • Right igloo: 5 Pumpkin, 1 Coffee, 1 Pineapple
    • Previous screen: 4000 Gold, 1 Silk, 1 Dragon Scales
EBF3 Valley21

While you're busy smashing through the wonders in the famed Loot Cave, I will proceed to annoy you about random stuff. First thing, do you know how much I have to do to get the map? First I have to take a picture, then take another picture, then replace the part with the player with another part not containing the player. It's a stupid low-tech process, and Photoshop does better, but I am stupid. Secondly, look at the snow dude outside the cave. Does that remind you of anything? I've always loved to hate the Red Mage, as he is equally incompetent in both CQC and magic.

You'll start to notice the power of Airstrike in this game. The game is starting to throw in multiple monoliths each wave, but if you're lucky enough (which you will usually be) and remembered to buff the party's defense often, Airstrike will utterly destroy everything in 1 or 2 turns. If you're focusing on the other characters, you would be grasping at straws right now. This only gets better later on, especially when the black bomb start to show up when you further upgrade it.

Before we move on, let's talk a bit about the loot. This cave contains 2 gears: the Viking Fur and the Blizzard. The Viking Fur is exactly what we want right now - we have been talking about warm clothes for hours. The Blizzard is like the Steel Shark - its Attack bonus and ice resistance bonus make this sword quite a reasonable weapon, although Ice skills are useless in this game according to my skills guide. When you're done murdering everything, exit the loot cave, go up the right path then to the right screen.

  • Chests:
    • First chest, guarded by monoliths: 3000 Gold, 5 Jaw Bone, 1 Magmaball
    • Second chest: 3 Curly Horn, 1 Solid Spike
    • Third chest: Viking Fur, 3 Fine Fur, 1 Silk
    • Fourth chest, guarded by eyeball: 1 Amethyst, 2 Rainbow Gems, 3 Sea Shell
    • Fifth chest: Blizzard, 2 Ice Crystal, 5 Bubble Stone
    • Behind snowmen, first chest: 1 Battery, 5 Magnet, 2 Steel Plate
    • Behind snowmen, second chest: 3000 Gold, 5 Rainbow Gems
Previous episode: Next episode:
Part 5: I've Seen Enough Weird Anime To Know Where This Is Going... Part 7: Medal Anxiety

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